Changing Pace

Hey,

So I am an Early Childhood Educator. I am creative and want to represent that here on the blog. I want to make a blog with tutorials and other personal things that I have created for the classroom that I work in.

I create felt projects, music projects, science experiments etc.

I will start to create pages with the projects on them. Post a little bit about what it is. What we did. How I created it and maybe even a little about how the kids liked it. How they played with it.

So, I will be starting that soon. (As soon as I have some stuff to post.)

Maybe tomorrow.
Thank you for reading.

 

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Life Milestones

Hello,

My life milestones have been far from perfect. Of course, if you asked five-year-old me, what I wanted to do when I was little; I wanted to be a mom. I wanted to be married, have kids and just live in the perfect house. All by the age of 21. Like my mom and dad before me.

Well, I am now 21-years-old and I can tell you that those milestones did not happen this year. I am completely okay with that.

I am okay with not being married right now or engaged. Although, my current boyfriend seems to think he will be proposing to me. (After five months, I am being a little hard on the idea.) The reason I am okay with not being married is that I am not ready to be someone’s life partner. I have too many personal problems I wish to deal with first before committing myself to one person. I want to mentally healthy for it.

I do not own my own house yet. (Although, I am looking for one right now.) I decided to go back to school once I was done high school and took Early Childhood Education. Being the first one in my family to go back to school. It was a large family milestone. Now, I am working on saving a down payment for the house, as well as, furniture and money for our dog who gets surgery in January.

I am also not a mother. Which right now, neither of us are ready for. Once I know for sure that this is the man I want to be with the rest of my life. Maybe we will start talking seriously about kids. But, I would also like to start putting money away for the child. So we can buy everything we need for them. Clothing, food, etc.

So at 21-years-old, I can proudly say- that I am okay that I didn’t meet my 5-year-old expectations. That I am happy with the milestones I have hit; going back to college, thinking about going back to get my degree, I am in a happy relationship, I have a puppy, and I am working full time.

I am happy to be where I am today.

I hope that someone reading this will make a post like this too. My advice for anyone- Take a moment to appreciate what you have and what you want to accomplish.

2018 Bucket List

Hello,

With the end of 2017 coming soon, I thought I would post a little article on my 2018 bucket list. Things I would like to have done before the end of 2018.

So here is my list.

  • Own my house
  • Travel to Banff with my boyfriend and puppy.
  • Spend every day outside in the sun.
  • Start house projects.
  • Create my own business
  • Save money
  • Find a sport that I can play all year long
  • Find some me time.
  • Stay healthy
  • Travel over seas.
  • Create new memories
  • Scrapbook the new memories
  • Take time for my friends and family
  • Find a balance in my life
  • Do yoga to help with my depression.
  • Keep writing to keep my thoughts clear and straight.

That is my bucket list for 2018. I might add more later, as I come up with ideas. I am thinking about blogging new experiences how I felt, what happened, and what is new in my life.

Keep blogging so that way I can create an understanding for my life.

Thank you for reading. Hope to see you soon.

AlwaysWinnie1996

New Year’s Resolutions

Hello,

December just started and it’s becoming that time of year to start thinking about New Year’s Resolutions. I never like doing these things. They are pointless things that are always focusing on superficial things. Losing weight or eating healthier. Everyone does some of the same things. I would have nothing to do with that. Of course, I should eat healthier and work out. But, it’s not what I would call a New Year’s Resolution.

My New Year’s Resolution would be something along the lines of creating a happier environment for myself.

Being happy, relaxing, being healthy (not being sick) and succeeding in this new life I have created. I am going to set a New Year’s Resolution to help me succeed in those ideas for myself.

I am not a hundred percent sure how I will accomplish that yet. Will have to post another article on how I decide to do this. But, I wanted to post something that would help me start on this journey.

Definitely, need to start going for walks again. Getting really tired of being inside all day. But, that is for another post.

Thank you for reading. Hope to see you soon.

Paige.

Wide Awake

Hello,

I haven’t been on very much lately. I haven’t had much time to talk or even write. I have had a lot to talk about and a lot bugging me. But, it has been a great time none the less.

I guess it’s time I start journaling my thoughts and feelings again. Of course, I know people are going to see this online. I know that it will help me sleep better at night when I do it. So, time to start writing again.

In August, my ex-broke up with me over text while I was with my family on vacation. I got Tinder (my best friend signed me up to help me keep my mind off it.) I mindless talked to guys and tried to keep my mind off my ex. Read 14 books during the trip. When I got back home. Well, I was stuck in a rut.

I went on a couple of dates, hooked up with a few guys. But, nothing felt right.

Meet this boy (or man) on the site. We hung out, had a great time. Now, we have been dating for 5 months. We are looking at getting our own place, we share custody of an 8-month-old husky and are in love.

We are spending Christmas together.

I am working at a job I thought I would love it. But, I am starting to feel worn down already. It’s only been five months at this job. Unless, I decide to try a different centre. Anyways, I am looking for new working experience.

I am also trying to pay off loans and other money expenses. While also working with my partner to figure out his money problems. Sometimes feeling completely overwhelmed.

I have never really had girlfriends (girls who are friends). I always had guyfriends. But, with this job I have gained a couple of really close friends and everything is turning out really good in that point of view.

One of the girls who I am getting really close with we are thinking about starting a felt company. She and I love creating felt creations in our spare time. We think we could really do it. For some extra money. So, we could work together and create, and be creative. So that’s another positive thing in my life right now.

Another positive thing about my life right now. It’s my boyfriend. He is keeping me grounded. He is always making me happy and always willing to take my thoughts into account.

 

I am very happy. Thank you for reading. Hope to see you again soon.

Paige. (AlwaysWinnie1996)

Day 3

Hello, Readers!

I am sorry for always posting these so late. But, wanted to post and check in. I am still doing the thirty-day challenge and I am already feeling a difference! I am getting more energy especially with changing my diet as well.

It was still hard to complete the run! But, I got it done. Slowly getting better every day. Soon, going to start going to the gym to exercise.

I hope everyone has a happy Tuesday!

Thank you for reading! See you soon!

 

Day 1 and 2

Hello, readers! So yesterday I posted pictures of my body as my starting point. What I forgot to do is put up a post about how the workout went and how I am feeling today!

So today, I woke up sore and my abs and core are burning like all hell. But, I feel good. I am feeling confident about this new outlook on life. I am ready for a change. The workout went smoothly and I was able to complete it easily.

Today, was another story. I just finished the second workout and man. I am hurting. I could barely finish the run. My abs were hurting really bad. I finished it but it took me longer than 25 minutes to finish. A lot of stopping and catching my breath. Also, stretching out my body. I am feeling good right now. I am feeling confident in myself.

 

So day one and two are completed. I am ready for anything that comes at me in the next week!

Thank you for reading! See you soon!

P.s. If you are doing a challenge, what are you doing? Are you enjoying it? Comment! 🙂

My Starting Point

Hello, my dear readers. So, I thought I would post something a little different. I decided to post pictures of my starting point in my adventure of working out, weight loss, eating healthy, and my body changing. I decided to do this to help myself keep track of my gains and my losses.

So! Here we go! I will start with pictures and then add in some talking! Please ignore the room. I have not had a chance to clean up some of the laundries that are on the floor. Anyways.

After weighing myself this morning, I am a hundred and nineteen pounds. I am five foot two. My butt is 38″, my hips 36″, my stomach 32″ and my bust is 32″.

Alright. SO this is me. This morning. I weighed myself, I took measurements and I also took these pictures. I was really excited to do this, but that slowly turned upside down. Because once I had taken the pictures, I had to find a way to make myself look better in them. But, I am not sucking in my stomach and I am not flexing. This is resting form of what I look like. I am proud that I am able to post something like this. Because like I said. This is my starting point.

I am super self-conscience about my body (who isn’t nowadays) and I would have never done this about 2 years maybe 3 years ago. I thought my body was disgusting. Not going to lie, somedays I still have that thought. I have come a long way from hating my body to where I am today. I am comfortable with my body. Do I wish that something would change? Yes. Am I doing something about it? Yes. Do I wish these results would happen sooner? Yes!! But, I am willing to work to get the results I want.

Now. I know a lot of people will look at this post and be like. OH my god (or goodness) she isn’t even fat. Why is she doing this? I will tell you why. I was a serious athlete growing up. All my life. I played competitive sports. I was in shape and had an amazing body. I look at pictures of myself when I was 14 to now- six years later. I hate how I let myself go.

I did not let myself go though. I had a sports injury. I dislocated my knee to the point that I needed surgery on it so that I could walk straight. Or go a day without it dislocated from me just swinging my legs out of my car and hitting it lightly against my steering wheel. I had to stop playing contact sports (which is where I got my body from and my will to work out) and had to wait for surgery. Once I had surgery, I had to do rehab to teach myself to walk again. I am right side dominant, which so happens to be the knee that had the surgery on it. I had to re-learn how to walk supporting myself on my left leg, not my right. Which took a lot of time because I am a stubborn person, and I think my way is the best way.

Fast forward to 5 months after my surgery and rehab, my depression kicked in. I did not want to do anything, I didn’t want to go out, I didn’t even want to be seen. I thought I walked with a limp, thought my life had lost purpose because I could no longer play contact sports. I thought I would never go to college because I would never be able to get scholarships. Everything had gone away that I held up on a pedestal. I stopped working out. I kept going to my therapist appointments, although she could tell that my heart wasn’t in it. To me, this injury was the end of the world.

Once again fast forward to 1 year ago. I was at the heaviest I had ever weighed in my life. I hated my body. I hated who I was, I hated how miserable I was. I hated everything about myself and would try to make other peoples lives miserable to just be miserable with me.  Until my best friend dragged me to the gym. He told me that I needed to work out what ever frustrations I was having and then apologize to everyone I was hurting. So, that is what I did. Even though, the first two weeks of working felt great. I felt like I could do it. Keep going. I would make excuses. My knee hurts. I can’t this week, school is too much, or work is too much. My heart was not into working out.

Fast forward to a month ago. My ex broke up with me. I blamed myself for not being pretty and not being thin. It took me about two days to come out of this slump and decide that I was going to change it. So, I set up an appointment with my therapist to see what kind of shape my knee was in, she would set me up with a routine to help me with my knee, and a workout routine that would focus on everyone I wanted to work on, with little to no pressure on my knee. But, still doing everything. I will have to work in moderation. But, I am ready to change my body.

I want to share it with everyone because everyone has their breaking point. Mine was my ex-breaking up with me and finally not letting my injury be my excuse. So this is my starting point. I hope this is inspiring for someone. Or if it’s just a platform for myself to ramble on.

Thank you for reading! See you soon!

 

Yesterday.

Yesterday was a hard day. Work was not easy, pulling myself out of bed last night was not easy, being aware of my surroundings yesterday was not easy. Having little to no support from myself to accomplish anything. I am very aware that I am not the perfect person, no one is. I felt yesterday was going to be hard. I just thought- I could push through it and not have to worry about being completely alone.

In a month, I will have been hanging out with the most amazing person that I have had the chance to meet. I never thought just being friends with someone would be so much on my mental health. I am happy now. I am the happiest I have been in a long time.

He makes me want to do things that I wouldn’t have done on my own. Go out partying, hanging out with friends, meeting new people, going walking almost every day (when he isn’t working) and just making feel relaxed in his presence.

I have mentioned to him about my past. About my recent breakup and not wanting anything anytime soon. Just wanting a friend. I know it sounds cliche, but he understands. He is willing to wait until I am ready for a relationship and if I want a relationship at all with him. Out of the experience, he has met a new friend. He is happy with it. Yes, he is human and said, that he would prefer if I was his girlfriend but would suck it up if that was something I didn’t want.

The more I hang with him and the more I am with him and talking, hanging out, laughing, and even the awkward silences. I want to be closer to him. I want to grab his hand and I want to hold onto it with all my might. Not letting go. From earlier posts, I have said I believe in soulmates and people who come into your life are not accidents. They are important and those signs should not be ignored. At times, I believe that it is true. But, I want to change my statement a little bit.

I believe in soulmates- but I believe that I am naive and young. I think I am in love with the idea of being loved. I do not want to get hurt in the long run but I also want that feeling of having a safe and warm place to go to when I have days like yesterday. I love the idea of having someone for me and only me (because I do not like to share.) I do believe that millennials (which I am) are given a bad reputation for wanting things just given to them. If I could have one thing given to me, why not my happiness? If I go into this relationship with an open heart and mind, shouldn’t that be my right? Should I be able to be happy? No matter how long it’s been since my breakup? or what everyone else would say? I should just focus on my happiness right? And, he makes me happy. Should I just take the leap of faith? I have been thinking about this since I meet him. I thought I should not be allowed to have fun because I just broke up with my ex. That I had to have those feelings of loss and grieve for a relationship- that didn’t have any passion or a way of moving forward.

I have been thinking a lot. I have been thinking way too much.  I wanted to write it down because once it’s out of my head. I will stop thinking about it so hard. I was scared to write this post because I knew millions of people would see it at some point. But, I thought that there had to be other human beings who are going through these feelings or have gone through these feelings. Hopefully, by writing these feelings it will help someone and will help me to figure out just what I want.

Thank you for reading. See you soon!

Today Is A New Day

Hello!

So, like in my other post, I talked about how I am ready to start working on my new chapter in my life. I am ready to accept myself. I am out of shape, I am tired, and I am tired of being tired. I am ready to accept those things. I am ready to change them.

Starting today, I will be starting 30-day challenges to help myself get back into shape and to also start eating properly again.

My 30-day challenge that I will be starting today is;

  • 30-day health challenge which is; day 1: chew 30 times day 2: Don’t eat past 7pm Day3: Eat vegetables at every meal. Day4: Cook at home Day5: Focus on posture. Day6: Laugh and Smile. Day7: Take the stairs. Day 8: Walk to work. Day 9: Sleep for 8 hours. Day 10: Stretch. Day11: Avoid salt. Day12: Don’t eat refined sugar. Day 13: only drink water. Day14: Eat what your body is asking for. Day 15: Eat 6 small meals a day. Day 16: Find a supplement. Day17: Give up weighing yourself. Day18: Don’t deprive yourself. Day19: Avoid trans fats and saturated fats. Day 20: Drink herbal tea. Day21: Try a new exercise. Day22: Buy a herb plant. Day23: Don’t eat processed foods. Day24: Use an SPF. Day25: Take a cold shower. Day26: Make your own granola. Day27: Eat until you’re satisfied. Day28: Don’t go shopping while hungry. Day29: Eat whole carbs. and Day30: Eat with pleasure. (Cheat day.)
  • Working out Challenge;My own 30 Days Full Body Challenge! Please try it!

This is the full body challenge that I will be taking on starting today as well. I am hoping to post every day and add comments to it. Comment on how I am feeling.

Alright. Well, that is all I have for right now. I hope to talk to you guys soon!

Thank you for reading. See you soon!